My Life as a Foriegn Dignitary

Some jobs provide an element of surprise on a daily basis, others are fairly status quo. Knowing that I require a challenge or otherwise get bored, I work in an area where pretty much anything can happen on any given day. Many of you are probably thinking along the lines of ER or Gray's Anatomy, you know, the drama. The reality is not as sexy or dramatic, but still mentally challenging. Hosting for the day two visitors from Korea was this years culmination of surprises (though the resignation of bobblehead did bring me both surprise and innate joy--meeow!)
The days events started off benignly enough. An email asking I spend time with the bariatric staff from Korea, talk to them about our program.
Having a son from Korea, I thought this to be a great opportunity. "No problem, looking forward to it!" I emailed back adeptly.
The email followed up about a week later, stating they had, in fact, arrived and they would be in clinic tommorrow. The rudimentary outline of the day included the morning with the surgeon in clinic and to "spend time with the dietitian in the afternoon."
The day started off rather chaotic, as 5 MBA-suits and the Director of the program usurped my conference room when I left to use the ladies room.
'My bladder is definately impeding my career" I thought, looking for the coordinator. If you are wondering, MBA-suits are clearly different from MD suits in the total look. MD-suits are a less, pressed or sharp (fierce!) look because they are taking their clothes on and off in transition to scrubs. Knowing these guys were likely important, the coordinator let me christen her newly constructed office,that smelled suspiciously of new rug.
After finally getting settled back in my appropriated spot, there was a knock on the door. A knock can only mean trouble, whether it be a new patient, an MD with a request, or someone trying to deliver food (and yes, that happens upstairs too-and I wonder if it is only a hazard for dietitians working with the morbidly obese).
One of the surgeons poked his head in.
"Hi, Umm, here is the person from Korea" he stuttered. Looking at the clock away from my patient, I noted it was about 10a and therefore only the 'afternoon' in Liverpool England or Rome, Italy, neither places we were currently inhabiting.
"Hi" I said extending my hand.
"Hello" nod, bow. I nod, bowed back, hopefully appropriately.
"you can sit right here" I pointed to a chair on the right. Heading to the left, she sat down at the other side of the table.
Hmm. It wasnt looking too good. I assumed they spoke English, but realized they spoke English about the same as I spoke Spanish. I had a baaadd feeling.
We started off seeing patients. I tried to speak slowly, I tried to say the same thing over in a different way so she could understand.
My patient looked at me quizzically, as if I had a stroke, but seemed kind enough not to say anything. After she left, we had a no-show and I went over some things with the dietitian from Korea.
We talked about (I think) what the diet is for pre op. She asked about protein shakes, if they were commercial. We fashioned a protein shake that wasn't commercial because protein shakes aren't big in Korea.
Another knock on the door. Surgeon poking his head in.
"Um, here is the other" he scurried out. It was about 11a and I noted again, this isnt the afternoon, somehow this situation screamed 'dump!'.
We had a patient who kindly let the two women sit in. They whispered in korean. I handed out diet education to all. Finally it was lunch.
Perplexed at the eating situation, and knowing that my lean cuisine was in the freezer, I tried to figure out what to do.
"We can eat lunch now" I said.
"We stay here?" she asked. "We see more patients?"
"No, we go to eat. We see more patients at a different place, another office."
"Oh." they nodded.
We all stared blankly at each other. Okay, I'll have lunch with them.
"Lets eat lunch." I stated. I wanted to be sure that I wasnt taking them from a pre-planned, not communicated meal. I Walked over to the surgeon in the other office.
"I was going to take them to lunch" I said, "but I am not sure, am I suppose to pay?"
Thinking of the 5 dollars in my wallet.
"I don't know, Ask the doctor who arranged this" he answered. Who, by the way, was probably in Omaha for the day for all I knew.
I suggested some places to eat.
"the cafeteria" they said in unison. We stood outside the crowded, ill-planned cafeteria reading the menu.
"They have Beef stew" I said. They looked at me quizzically. Great. How does one describe beef stew. "They have Ruebens." I dont even know what is in a freakin rueben, nor how to correctly spell it.
"PIZZA!" they stated. Thankfully, they liked American pizza.
"I will meet you here" I pointed.
"you come, eat pizza." They said. Oh boy.
"I will go to get a sandwich, and I will meet you in a seat."
"You not come here?"
arrgh.
I finally broke away, got a sandwich and found them sitting down next to an older gentleman and a gaggle of MD interns.
"They from Korea?" the older man asked.
"Yes, they are visiting here" I answered. He turned to them,
"I was in Korea in the war. Beautiful country but not so beautiful when I was there,pretty screwed up. Where are you from"
"Seoul" they answered.
"I was in ...." Not sure how to translate this, I focused on my tomato-less sandwich and hoped it all went well.
We proceeded down to my office, where my patient was waiting. A patient who was, lets say, a little outgoing. We brought her in the office-which was a 8 by 10 space and all three of us crowded in. Though in a wheel chair, she was bubbly, vivacious, yet nervous about the surgery, chattering a mile a minute.
She rubbed one of the women's arms. "Oh, your skin is so soft!" she said. Not sure if this was a cultural insult, I sat tight.
"So, are you checking your blood sugar?" I asked
"NO, I AM A MORON!" she said. She turned to them, "DO you know what a moron is?"
they nodded no in unison.
"It is someone who is stupid, stupid stupid!"
Oh crap. We are now teaching the nice Korean visitors rude American slang.
They looked stunned. Not sure if Moron was a swear word.
She went on to ask questions about them. They chatted with her respectfully. Somehow I got the diet education in and wheeled her outside where transport was picking her up.
It was 4p at this point, and they looked tired. "You need a break!" and they left for their hotel for a few hours until the evening program.
They met up with me that night, they gave me presents. Lots of Korean presents. THey took my picture, they were happy.
I went home that night, exhausted. My son was waiting.
"Hey, look!" I gave him the gorgeous Korean wrapped presents to open. He opened a mirror with a silk pouch, a keychain and a special book mark from the Korean Diabetes Association.
"WOW!" he exclaimed. "Can I bring them in for show and tell?"
"Sure, but you have to say they are from Korea. Mommy had two visitors from Korea and she told them all about you."
"Mom, do they miss me over there?" he asked.
Like the rest of the day, not a question I could easily answer.